And what I think.
Hi there! Yes, I know the title says Resolutions and January. No, I'm not late.
Eat more fruit. Continue the daily run. Write more.
I have always been skeptical about new year resolutions. Never been one to follow this tradition with intent and seriousness. Having said that, I’d be lying if I said that I have never reviewed my year end of December and imagined myself doing things differently. There is something about that time of the year, the end and the beginning. The question “what did I do the whole year?” pops up, sometimes uninvited, - and it is tough to escape.
As I sat down to write, with no nudge needed I began with last year's review/reflection. The culture of intense expectations caught up to me and my head decided to make a list of all the things I wasn’t able to achieve. Like how some time last year, I had decided I'd “post more regularly”. One needs to look around the website only a little to know how that one went.
(Side note: I also feel like a fraud because I am also the person who has written a how-to post on Perseverance!)
And then here with February nearing its end, I was sitting in front of the diary with a crippling, saddening mental list of incomplete things-to-do and a newfound sense of defeat. "I don't even believe in the practice, the very act of creating a New Year Resolution seems illogical, why review?! Is it even worth it? It’s unlikely I’ll stick with doing anything dramatically different than before. Who does anyway? Surely, most people are only setting themselves up for failure – no? Maybe."
I put the writing away and decided to go for my run. And that is when I realised something...
“Hey, I am not a complete slacker.”
Last year, I had tried to add a walk to my everyday routine. It took me a while, but I made it happen. In my automatic recap of year 2022 though, I had totally missed that!
For my most recent 2-part-decision too, the situation is rather bleak; so far fruits haven’t really made their way into my daily diet. I cannot deny though that the other half is going great (okay not great but pretty well)! I'm still going for the runs!
Another kinder review revealed that along with the discarded, forgotten goals, there were a few things I actually did successfully. I hadn't named them 'goals', but I want to keep doing them. I am not going to forget about my weaknesses or ignore what went wrong, but I am also not going to forget things I have accomplished, to keep doing what I’m doing – knowingly, celebrating my attempts and small wins too.
I guess what I want to say is that if you were able to walk a little more this past year; or were able to go somewhere new or somewhere you hadn't been in a while, make new friends or visit old ones, spend time with family, all of these are accomplishments; to be celebrated and, most importantly, Hey! Keep it up!
Then there's the matter of January.
Reflection is essential, yes. We learn about what went well and what didn’t. It helps us gain perspective, allows us to be more directed and less auto-pilot-y. And like I said earlier, there is something about that time of the year. There is so much pressure on the beginning of the year to be magical. Truth be told, 1 January should be no better than any other day to make a life change. Seriously, what does opening a new calendar got to do with this? Also, you may make a goal on January 1st and, by June, realize that your priorities have changed and that your resolution no longer lines up with where your time and energy are needed.
So, if you had done the “New Year, New Me” bit this year and now find yourself re-evaluating your resolutions, I'm with you! Even if you didn't set a resolution, I'm with you!
All I'm saying is that whether you fell off the New Year's resolution, or never cared for the practice, it doesn't mean that you can't hit self-improvement goals throughout the year anyway. If you’ve started to founder in February, remember there's other months with beginnings. A little reframing and we can get the boost of the fresh-start effect all over again.
Yes, I have little to no idea about what will transpire in the coming months, but I still hope that we all, slackers or not, are able to turn the page whenever we are ready. Drop New Year from the tradition of making resolutions. And keep my favourite parts about it - the new page, new beginning, fresh start approach. The distance it lets us put between our past mistakes and us, the feeling of “I’ll do better”.
The belief that tomorrow will be better.
To January and beyond, folks!
P.S. Happy New Year! :)
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